K.I.S.S. & CREATE
ODD LIFE TIPS
I. Let’s K.I.S.S.
“Keep It Simple Stupid “ - Dwight Schrute via Michael Scott.
Honestly, this is the best life advice from the Michael Scott Healing Company (it’s not a thing - I just made it up) I’ve heard. For any of you Office fans out there, KISS is the motto, babe. Your relationships, vocation, calling, fork-in-the-road choices, etc. — here is some food for thought: does it enhance life? Bring joy? Health? Love? Does it make you feel safe and grounded? Does it build trust? Expand the scope of your horizons? Make you feel lighter, finer, classier, sassier? I suggest, especially given what I feel and see for the next ten years, that you create an environment that supports simplicity and eliminates complicated bullshit. The beauty of life is in her poetry. Poetry lives in the space between. How can you feel life in the space between if everything is so complicated? You can’t. You get distracted by bullshit, becoming morose and pessimistic, which doesn’t support creativity. And creativity is basically God. Therefore; we need that flowing. God. Life Force. Creativity. Joy. It must Flow. Feel me? So if things are too chaotic for you to flow, make some changes. If people suck up your flow, bounce them. Byeeeeeeeeee!
When life is simple, it is easier to create what you want. If you are an artist at heart, when life is simple it is much easier to be creative.
“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” - Da Vinci.
“Any fool can make something complicated. It takes a genius to make it simple.” - Woody Guthrie.
II. Crown Therapy
This is a form of free therapy. My descriptions of free therapy are a form of free therapy. Also, I may say odd things.
I’ve tried giving tips for free therapy before, but I don’t know if anyone did it. Ha! Oh shucks, I’ve got a million tips for free therapy. For example, try throwing yourself a dance party in the living room whilst you cook. Or, perhaps rather, *not* whilst you cook so you don’t burn everything up, like moi.
I legitimately enjoy personal dance parties several times a week. Air guitar. Real guitar. I am the star as well as my back up dancers. Choreography. The works. Videos of my moves may or may not go to friends, on occasion. It’s great! Gotta look alive in times like these, folks. It may take double what it normally does. Speaking of dance parties and music, shout out to my dear love and old school TX artist pal from way way back when, DYLAN MEEK & my dear love and cosmic minstrel pal SCOUT LARUE WILLIS for being incredible artists whose work I adore, support and honor. I like wolf people, ya know. These folks understand amps, vibes, and ride in our tribe. You guys know I love Action Bronson, Meyhem Lauren and Styles P. For newbies — I worked with Vice to heal some rappers and we played cosmic jazz and became soul friends. I’ve heard they’ve re-aired my episode but I don’t know. When it came out initially, I hid under the bed while Helena laughed at me. Anyways, give Dylan and Scout a listen if you haven’t yet! And if any of you missed my last column on karmic relationships, you may have missed my friend POPE. He’s got a new album out too. Check them out at your next house dance party or go see them in around the country and support our team. If you’re a musician on this list playing anywhere in the southwest soon — get at me 💫.
I’ll work in the dancers, filmmakers, designers and painters as well soon. The mystics and artists must be supported! I’m not talking content creators or the walking tech dead. I said artists, ya’ll. T’was the death of the soul artist upon the birth of the “creative techpreneur,” just a term I made up to explain it but you know what I mean.
Hold onto that which uplifts the soul and know the difference between what is alive and what is dead; that which is conscious and that which is not. If you do not understand this, now, at this stage on Earth— well shit man, good luck…
Now, back to free therapy ❤️🔥.
You know, humans use to sing, dance, tell stories, cook together and gather around a fire before bed. They helped each other with their children, like on a regular basis. Made sure their friends weren’t sick, they’d go out of their way to help them if they were dying— shit like that. Now we shut doors and lock up our hearts out of fear. Little ole’ fear. Pretty basic huh? Petty, superficial. Quite boring. And yep, it’s just a program. And it’s not right. You have been systematically programmed. The more you begin to understand this the more likely it is that you’ll do something about it. You may just become triple threat to the system by deciding who you are and who you are not. I say go for it. Rebel Rebel!! ⚡️⚡️⚡️
We were made to care for each other, families, friends, this Earth and for life around us. Toes in the dirt, remember? Silent night. Velvet black. No light pollution or EMF toxicity. Star scapes abound. Talking in mysteries. Light the fires. Raise up the wild. Hear the wind, remember? Shhhh. It was before. It was important. The memories in your bones are important. Stand in them. You will need them.
I was lucky. Maybe mine was the last generation that had the luxury of a natural childhood, no matter how fucked up it we all were 😂 😎. Skipping rocks. Muddy feet. Rain. Howling like a wolf in genuine knowing that I, truly, was communing with the otherworld. Good times. Sharing and connecting in these most natural ways was foundational to human beings being human.
Dance.
Sing.
Teach yourself an instrument.
Help someone who has a child. Or a pet.
Cook someone dinner. Guaranteed someone around you is wildly wiped!
This I promise you— it’s uncommon for people to instinctfuly help strong people. Go to someone strong, and ask if they need help.
Here is another one: talk out loud to yourself stream of consciousness style, until you’re one and done and it’s all run out. You’d be surprised at what you have to say. Try not to judge yourself. It’s coooool, baby. Let’s just see what’s under the rug, you know? Then take some inventory on what the hell came out. Again no self judgment or critics. Judge off, mother-judger.
Here’s the difference between people who grow and people who don’t: some people fear what’s under the rug too much to check fully and some people don’t. Unseen shadow is demon food. So sweep your F%CKING floors, kids. It’s that simple. Don’t be scared, now. But, I know you’re not. If you’re on this list you ain’t scared. Life is short. You don’t have as much time to mess around as you think you do. It’s all precious. All of it.
Here’s another form of free therapy — the forgiveness exercise. Look at yourself in the mirror sincerely, while speaking to your soul. Begin to say, “I forgive you {self / your name / someone you are mad at} for… x….. y …. z…. And your subconscious may start to shake, rattle & roll. Emotional pain may purge and flow out the door.
Ah, and of course this crazy classic- THE SCREAM. Try screaming into a pillow. Or in your house if your neighbors aren’t close enough to call the cops. Or at a friend, frankly, if they’re a good friend who knows you aren’t screaming AT them, but they’re holding space for your screams un-phased. My clients do it all the time. They say, “ Excuse me, Kalisa, I think I have to scream…” Please do so, I say, ehhem, go on now… lest that animal brain goes wild and you scream inappropriately at someone who actually doesn’t deserve your wrath.
Here’s a good one - wait for SpamSalesRobotAutomoton.Com/marketingharrassment to call you again, and just say, “Thank goodness you called! My therapist just cancelled and I’ve been dying for someone to talk to,” and just lay it all on the table. If they hang up on you just call their house over and over again.
Put on sneakers and run. Run until there’s nothing left! Be gone like the wind. Besides it will make you healthy, too.
Oh, wait, how about this one. It literally requires nothing. Zilch. And, it is a prerequisite for Crown Therapy. All you have to do is sit privately and in silence for an hour. You don’t have to pay anyone! But you do have to sit there with your mighty fine self and observe your thoughts. Are you anxious? Bored? Mad? Freaking out? Do you love sitting with yourself? Do you hate it? Why? What do you feel? What flows through your mind? Observe. Observe. Observe. Curiouser and curiouser. Like Alice. See how ping-pong-y your monkey mind is rolling and try to get through that. Beginners— after about 22 min your mind will start to soften into a higher stream. When the hour has passed, write out insights and observations. I am basically trying to trick you into meditation, here. Did it work? For more on meditation check out my music or book to get started.
However, CROWN THERAPY applies the K.I.S.S. method x free therapy, taking the whole shebang to a new level of pure, unadulterated… sass.
Here’s what you do: first, buy a crown. Yes, that’s correct, like a royal crown. I have two. One is quite regal and prestigious, holding the aesthetic tone of an Earthly monarch; while the other is more reminiscent of an otherworldly, fay Queen who dons an earthy, verdant green, gossamer cape for shapeshifting into other realms and timelines (not that I would know anything about that ;)
So, you take your chosen crown, appropriate to the mood and moment, and place it upon your absolutely royal head. Mine are made of crystals of course, to support the crown chakra. Next, find a comfortable position seated with a relaxed but straight spine and breathe deeply for an hour as a King or Queen— whatever feels most appropriate to you. For me, it depends on what archetype I need to connect with. Take note of whatever arises and ask yourself how a true, divine, brave, honorable, ruler would handle the situation. Play pretend. Get method with it. I used to study method acting and found it very powerful for manifesting.
Now, when I ask you to sit with what a divine king or queen would do, I am not asking you to look to current rulers or inspiration.
Instead, I am asking you to use your imagination. Look to your deepest, interior landscape of the heart, mind and soul. I want you to remember the stuff of deep folklore and mythologies for these are the tales in your blood and bones. You are a living library of truth. This inner, other reality is what the world needs right now. The world forgot. You are here to remember. This is your life. It’s between you and you. Get even more quiet. The stories and knowings inside are the ones I want you to remember as you sit quietly wearing your crown. Do not discredit your dreams, wishes, nor your wildest, constructive desires. Let your subconscious communicate with you. Be not afraid of yourself. You are beauty, incarnated. There is a higher truth. A stream. It flows, always within you. Those who know it always look for the currents of light. Stay high. It’s all inside. There’s no exterior BS that’s going to do it for you. It’s not real, anyways. It is temporal. But you are real. That is real which never changes. Your depths are real. You are a microcosm of the universe and I am honored to speak with you today. We’re in this together.
So friends, enjoy the music and if you try some of these things, let me know how it goes. I am sending you much love and all the amps I’ve got ;)
With a’Whole Lotta Love,
Kalisa