DEATH IS COOL
I don’t know how or why I am starting here. But as I sit down to write I am instantly reminded of a story from my past. Perhaps I’ll discover the meaning of its telling as I share and recall.
So, I used to work out of a super posh office in the flatiron district of Manhattan. And one day, I was sent a package from Oregon State Penitentiary to this very femme, chic, fashion friendly spa, usually filled with the hustle and bustle of NYC gazelles going about their beauty business.
You can imagine the contrast in tone here: Kalisa’s Prison Package x NYC Beauty/Wellness world. Ha! Hi. My core is hardcore. Mighty fine exterior that can dance in different worlds, but this dynamo is dynamic. And yeah, actually - it would be in alignment for me to receive shit from prison. No surprises here. For others, perhaps, it was a bit weird not knowing the full context of who I AM and why I exist right now. Anyhow, a prison inmate sent me a package filled with handmade art and expressions of sentiment. Some of the women I worked with were freaked out and felt unsafe. I just observed everyone’s comfort level and flowed with it. I’m a team player but honestly, I was like- WTF, c’mon. Live a little, little doves. All is well.
I had different sentiments on the matter. I am a fucking healer. That means I am not here to paint people’s toenails so they feel pretty at the Queen’s court. I am an energetic alchemist. I catalyze great change. I am weird. I see what most do not and have my whole life. Alchemist. Release density and gravity from Earth sphere in whatever way is called for through turning darkness into light - an art and science requiring an innate gift and lots of discipline. That’s the point- dark to light. I can’t tell you how many of my clients are cosmic bad boys and bad girls atoning the fuck out of their karma. Oh hell yeah, those are the fun ones!
Worlds are always changing, so I will see what’s next, but this is the essence behind creativity and healing for me: alchemical transmutation and soul activation. Ya! Giddy up! You know, the Jewish avatar known as the Christ born into a lineage of prophets, in my opinion, is the greatest healer ever known to planet Earth, and that dude was not healing in palaces, hon. No, no - this being from on high was with the forgotten, homeless, outcasts and misfits. I can’t tell you how many heartfelt healing conversations I’ve had at biker bars. Seriously…
So, when I opened the contents of the package, I was honored. This was real deal to me. More important than press or any of that shit.
Sure, the inmate made a beautiful book of poetry about me. It was carefully done. I can see why and how it could be considered creepy. But I’m not really scared of that shit. You see, I could tell his brain and soul needed something artistic to work on so as not to go insane. His penmanship was immaculate. His drawings were so carefully done. He put such care and effort into his creation. I said to myself, an artist is an artist no matter where you are. It was about me, but also not about me at all — it was about him having some sort of muse on which to focus so as to create a channel for his artistic expression in a state of hell, in a literal fucking prison. At least, that’s how I saw it. He created a book of poetry, wrote me a letter, drew some photos of me I think and he started a mindfulness and meditation group in his prison. He even sent me the flyer he created to promote helping others. This man began uplifting other inmates in service of finding their center, finding spirit, and finding the light within themselves in a very dark place. That’s the literal fucking point— finding the light in the dark. I have wanted to work with inmates and in prisons for years. I’ve tried to get in a couple times but nothing landed. I have the packaging where they’ll listen to me, and I have the inner strength and experience to create vibrational resonance and throw some dark shit into a light tunnel. In time, I’ll be helping them get through their time. I know it.
Sidenote***I do think one of the most fucked up things is having people in jail for weed. It makes me insane and want to get in the ring. The number of people of color held in prison, lives destroyed, for using God’s herb disgusts me. Cannabis is a gift to heal trauma, relieve pain, move into higher minds, amongst many other things. And it can be used consciously, scientifically and properly. People who are STILL about keeping good folk in jail for smoking weed need to wake up. Bye. It’s an issue I am very serious about as it is a safe, natural and affordable way to support working with PTSD, all forms of illness and pain consciously and sans big pharma. A stick (brainspotting wand). A stone (my crystal). A joint (a plant) — that’s it baby cakes. Bada-bing-bada-boom. I can teach you to self heal with a stick and a stone. No need for a million dollar GOOP serum. Insert dramatic, Leonian, absolutely not subtle eye - roll. Did you catch it?
So, back to my inmate friend. He wrote me a letter telling me how my work and presence had influenced his life as he sat in that jail cell. Again, a little context —I did a couple of shows for Vice TV with Action Bronson and Mayhem Lauren. I guess somehow the inmates got to watch some episodes where I did some healing work publicly. That’s the angels doing their thing right there, you see? I remember when I was asked to do the show, I was quite concerned about exposing myself publicly. I was still building my reputation as a business woman. I was concerned about what people would think. I had been destroyed before on public platforms, oh what was it, a cheesy one, so corny and popular that I can’t even remember the name. Anyhow, I said to God, I said, “God, Angels, Spirit Team, Ancestors, you gotta be kidding me. No way am I doing this. My clients don’t even really know what I do — their eyes are CLOSED while I work. And I like it that way. I can’t heal, or do actual healing work, on TV. No way. No one can watch.”
"Pshhhhhhh,” they said… Fuckin’ diva sorcerer. Blue M&Ms only in my wizard cave. The holy water does not have rose mist… call the concierge! {JK character tangent… I digress.}
But anyways, Action is a special cat, he’s here to be himself as a leader, a way shower, and to give others permission to be themselves. He’s a real deal care bear and was like a little angel to me. I needed to get over how people perceive me because I have no control over that. I gotta just do my thing. His higher self covertly asked me to come out and heal for people who wouldn’t normally have access to me. I am a hermit. So I was tweaked about the situation. At the end of the day, guidance from spirit simply communicated a profundity with which, I could not argue. I knew it was true. The conveyance was that if I would just pull up my big girl panties and do the show, anyone who watched it would receive healing energy whether or not they understood it. So, how could I not do it? Even if it meant I got made fun of, or whatever my ego was worried about. So I did. Through the years I received confirmation of this profundity through reflections of people who watched the show.
When I got the prison package perhaps a half a year later, I was moved. I don’t remember everything about his personal story — but the moral of this story is that death brings new life. Ah, circling back to the title of this column. Death is cool. If this man, who lost everything and had to go to prison, was able to find some kind of light in a dark cell and made the hard, conscious choice to inspire himself and others through art, love, and healing work— buck up baby, because you can too. It takes some mental effort to have faith. It really does. Mine tests me. I won’t lie to you. I’ve become more of a healer through faith overtime, but it came because I watched quantum data. I was more of a spiritual scientist. I needed evidence all the time when I started. I want results, to test experiments, to understand vibration and metaphysics through my genius zone and to take it as far as I could. However, there came a time when the Light said, okay cookie - you have access to information most don’t and you still lack faith in yourself and your path? Well, let us help you out out a bit. The hard way… I unconsciously chose to put myself in situations that took me away from myself, my skill, my health, my life my friends and basically everything I am as a being. I learned. And I died. And I died. And I died. And I lost. And I lost. And I lost. And I learned. And I learned. And I learned. And I survived. And I recovered. Again and again and again like a song. Tap dance on the stars. Tap dance through the dark. Nothing can swallow you.
Luckily I have had my fill of learning the hard way, hehe 😜 . Oh, mama. Oh daddy. Do I have faith? Yes indeed I do. All is well. All will be well. We are all learning and growing. Even Gaia. Even your enemies. The conditions, the people you see as the opposition have their place and purpose. Balance. Balance. Balance. When it is balanced the timeline zips itself clean and is erased by light creating more space to dance and play on Earth. If you know what I mean, cool. If you don’t- just take it in the energy of what I just said. The aspects that fail you, the aspects that you failed - have their place and purpose. All is well. You are perfect. Everything is leading to what is meant to be. Allow the flow to carry you. Allow your deepest knowing and instincts to guide you. Allow the death. Allow the surrender, and know that you are the resurrection and the life. No matter what. It’s all in you.
The wheel turns and returns. We have cycles to a season and ebbs and flows to our lives. This does not mean one must fetishize the karmic wheel, obsessing over every little karmic motion and sign. The point is to emancipate yourself from heavy karmic effect game theory ya’ll— meaning cause and effect plays which further create suffering and fucked-up-ness.
Not only must we look at our actions in this life but other lives. We must take emotional inventory of who we actually are by what we are actually thinking and feeling and thus doing. If you don’t see yourself, or your shadow, or your shit— why would you expect any sort of change or alchemy? Grab the shadow, man! In order to do so one must acknowledge its existence. During this lunar scorpio event — I really had to feel and see a side of myself that would torch a fucking galaxy. Careful, careful now, fire child. Oh I see myself, and I honor my discipline in this life. But how would I know what kind of support, both inner and from relational interactions, I need without understanding who I am- light and dark, good and bad, up and down?
You have to die while you are alive to understand the light of life. This is something I truly believe. To die is to completely surrender, let go of all attachments, trust that what is, is what it is, and allow transformation to alchemize the situation. There may be stillness. Decay. Loss. Lack. Confusion. Illness. Pain. Fear. Sure…. But, whatever, you can handle it. Why? Because worlds are always changing and endings are beginnings. Can you begin a’ new like my innate friend? Can you find the art and the light, even isolated and caged? Yeah, you fucking can. Because you are a child of the Light and born free by divine design. There is a game I like to play, it’s called I WIN. I’ve mentioned this game before, but wanted to share it once more just in case you forgot who you are. You already won the lottery being here. You already won the lottery having an understanding of conscious creation and being open to spiritual nourishment. I don’t know where you live right now, but most of you were not born into a third world country. You have access to iPhones where you can check these articles any time you want. Don’t be lazy, foolish, or ungrateful. Life works out a little easier that way.
CHILL OUT with your matrix stressing: these things that do not matter. Most of it is bullshit anyways and when you die, you will not give a flying fuck about the things you are stressed about in this moment. You will care about how deeply you loved, and how much love you were able to receive. You will care about how you lived and what life means from a soul level. What is aliveness? All is now. You will see a million paths to have taken, like branches on an oak tree. You will say WOW what wild opportunities were there, just for me!
Go on, do a little death meditation. I tried this with my Google crew, but too soon Kalisa, easy — let’s start with a chakra cleanse not a death meditation for the techies LOL. I know I know, I need bumpers when in the matrix. Ava? Madi? I need a handler….
So anyways, this ain’t no matrix shit— so get into a meditative state. Ground your energy. Do some breath work. For step by step instructions on how to tune in to higher energies in a meditative state - buy THE ENERGY BOOK. Share THE ENERGY BOOK. Post about THE ENERGY BOOK. Support your local Wizard and let’s get Helena to college! We’ve had your back from day one. Helena has been with me on this ride or die journey to support other people as #1. Help us make it through, by supporting my writing. I thank you in advance. Hell. yeah! Go team! So, in this book - I guide you right through the basics. Call in the Light. Ask your highest self to animate your mind, body and spirit in the name of all that is good and holy, in the name of the highest righteous Light. And then, meditate on the moment of death. Ask your highest self to be with you during this poly-chronic-bi-location-conscious time travel so you can sense your way into the energy of this transformational moment. Now, ask your highest self this question: “What matters?” And you will be shown.
Take what comes from your subconscious. Write it down. And frankly, why wait until you die to honor and value what matters? Do it now. Let go of this world. Be in it, but not of it. The beat goes on. The path always winds. The walk is the swag, the mojo, the amps, it is how you do everything. It’s not what it is, it is how you do it—for what is will always change and mutate in capricious ways so cling not to form. You’ll be devastatingly depressed most of the time if you are rigidly attached to the way things are in any given moment. Shit changes. That’s what keeps things interesting.
Let yourself die a thousand times. If you do so consciously, you will discover who you are and who you are not. Be willing to hold space for pain body leaving your systems: neuro-physical, energetic, emotional, psychological. Wait. Hold Strong. Wait. Breathe it out. You will refine the kind of life quality you wish to nourish and co-create with the ever-present currents of spiritual energy that sing and dance for the believers, the mystics, the philosophers, the artists the open-hearted. It is here and it is now. Look beyond what the two eyes can see and you will find starlight. It never dies. The light is right. The light is real. The light is the way. No matter what happens or does not happen on this planet. Looks and tricks are for kids. Stay with the light and the truth. Be in the real. Be in the real. Be not distracted by fanciful bullshit and you cannot help but become a part of the refined, gossamer God-Light fabric reweaving the cosmos unto a higher octave at this time of harmonic frequency elevation.
It’s a wild world out there. Be cool, man. Go ahead and die. And then go ahead and rise. And go ahead and walk on, babe. Nay - STRUT! One foot in front of the other. I’m right here with you. I promise you that!
And remember, death is cool if you use it to truly live. May the Source be with you all.
Love,
Kalisa